Disabilities Are Not Swearwords:
Disabilities Are Not Swearwords.
There is something deeply unsettling about watching adults weaponise medical conditions as insults.
Recently, in a local Darlington group, children’s behaviour was criticised by throwing around real diagnoses — including Foetal Alcohol Syndrome — as if they were punchlines. As if they were shorthand for “bad”, “feral”, “wrong”.
Let me say this plainly:
Using conditions like Foetal Alcohol Syndrome as an insult is not commentary. It is dehumanising.
It reinforces stigma that real children live with every single day. And when adults model that behaviour publicly, it normalises cruelty.
Disabilities are NOT swearwords.
Diagnoses are NOT insults.
If children behave harmfully, address the behaviour.
Call out racism. Call out aggression. Call out misconduct.
But do not drag disabled children into it as collateral damage.
Because when someone says, “What in the foetal alcohol syndrome…” as shorthand for bad behaviour, what they are really communicating is this:
Disability equals bad.
Disability equals violent.
Disability equals defective.
Disabled children see that.
They absorb that.
They carry that.
And then society acts surprised when disabled young people struggle with isolation, shame, anxiety and self-worth.
Language shapes culture. Culture shapes safety.
Safeguarding Isn’t Optional
When I challenged the ableist language, the response wasn’t reflection. It wasn’t accountability.
Instead, I was personally targeted.
The focus shifted from the harm caused to disabled children, to attempting to discredit me.
That is not safeguarding.
That is deflection.
I was falsely accused of condoning racism — which I did not — and was subsequently mocked and personally targeted by Amanda Scott, who identified herself as being from Northside Estate Agents.
Rather than engage with the safeguarding concern about using diagnoses as insults, she chose to ridicule the issue. I have since blocked her, as I will not participate in exchanges where protecting children from harmful and abusive language is treated as something to laugh at.
Harmful behaviour is harmful behaviour. Full stop.
But condemning racial abuse and challenging ableism are not mutually exclusive positions.
You can do both.
You should do both.
Instead of examining the misuse of a diagnosis as a slur, the conversation became about me — my tone, my character, my intelligence.
That is what happens when people are uncomfortable being challenged.
But discomfort is not harm, Ableism is.
We recently lost a young autistic person in Darlington. That is not political. That is not dramatic. That is devastating.
When adults casually use diagnoses as insults, they contribute to an environment where disabled children feel less valued, less understood, less safe.
And when someone attempts to silence or belittle the person raising safeguarding concerns, that compounds the harm.
Disabled children read comment threads.
Disabled teenagers scroll these groups.
They see how adults talk about people like them.
They notice who defends them — and who mocks them.
Adults in positions of visibility — in business, in community spaces, in public roles — have a responsibility to model better.
Safeguarding is not just about physical protection. It is about cultural protection.
It is about choosing language that does not dehumanise.
It is about understanding that words carry weight.
Let’s Be Clear
I did not label those children as disabled.
I challenged the use of disability as an insult.
There is a difference.
Whether those specific children have a diagnosis is irrelevant.
Diagnoses should never be used as slurs in the first place.
Calling that out is not anger.
It is advocacy.
It is protection.
It is choosing to stand on the safeguarding side of the line.
In moments like this, adults have a choice:
They can reflect and correct harmful language, or double down and attack the person raising concern. One path protects children; the other protects ego. Disabled children matter, and their diagnoses are not insults or shorthand for wrongdoing — they are part of real human beings who deserve dignity. Language shapes culture, and culture shapes safety, which means the impact of our words is real.
I will always choose dignity, challenge ableism, and safeguard language that affects vulnerable young people, because if we want a safer Darlington and a kinder society, adults need to start acting like it.
Sarah Wingfield
Independent Disability Advocate
#DisabilityInclusion #StrongerTogether #DisabilityRights #DisabilityAwareness #EndAbleism #SafeguardingMatters
Alt text:
Square pastel kawaii advocacy graphic with a pink, lilac and glitter-style background, lace-effect borders and sparkles. At the top, bold purple and yellow text reads: “Using Disabilities as Insults is NOT OK.” A small heart logo in the top right corner says “Kawaii Doll Decora.”
On the left side is a screenshot of a Facebook comment by “TurquoiseMoose8737” that reads: “What in the fetal alcohol syndrome.. Pathetic little wanna be gansters with no respect. Hardly doubt the parents will care if their darlings are like this.” Reaction icons appear beneath the comment. Below it is another small notification-style screenshot showing “Amanda Scott reacted to your comment: ‘Amanda Scott Yep 👍 I save lives. So…’”
On the right side is a square photo of a smiling woman at an outdoor garden event with the word “BLOCKED” stamped across the image in large red capital letters. The name “Amanda Scott” appears underneath the photo.
At the bottom of the graphic, between a kawaii pink bunny holding a pencil and a blue teddy bear holding a heart, text reads: “Comparing children’s behaviour to conditions like ‘Foetal Alcohol Syndrome’ isn’t commentary. It’s dehumanising. Diagnoses should not be used as slurs, ever.”
The website credit “KawaiiDollDecora.uk” is centred at the bottom.
