06:39 am and as usual sleep deprived and in agony and crying:

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For the last few weeks my pain has got worse (it was always constant) but now it's much worse and it is keeping my husband and I awake.

I am sick of all this torture, it's bad enough being in pain all the time but thinking about if that person sat behind that desk at DLA who needs to make an opinionated assumption as to whether they feel I need 24/7 care without sending me a medical assessor experienced in severe SPD, declines me again despite factually needing 24/7 care our lives will just get much worse as we are not eligible for anything. It's not like we can say, oh OK then, our bad.... my husband still cannot work, I still need 24/7 care and we have no choice but to appeal again to take it to a tribunal.

I have sent them confirmation in letter form from my G.P stating I am likely to have it months after the childbirth due to the severity of my SPD, documents on minor (some areas severe) SPD and requested a home medical assessment in an essay of a letter about my individual case.

All we can do now is sit and wait with our fingers crossed they can see the proof is there!

In the meantime, our lives have fallen apart and I am now depressed so need to speak with someone.

Any sane person having everything they ever worked for and owned ripped away from them and leaving them bare when they are pregnant and in need of food etc. due to a disability they are likely to have for a minimum of 2 months up to 2 years after childbirth that was just sprung on them and not their fault would feel the same.

I am worried about others, what would happen to a single mother expecting that needs 24/7 care if she has not got anyone to look after her and social services cannot provide the care she needs, and who would be there to help her look after the baby as it is not her fault if she gets SPD that causes all this??? Would they leave her in the same position as us? Without a bath/shower/toilet? Without a home (luckily we have a roof over our head as we have gotten a council house) and without carpets (stone cold concrete floors) and without financial help for food/bills/rent etc???

We're out of options.... ring DLA on thursday but don't hold breath...


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