Posts

Showing posts from May, 2024

Top 5 recommended reads:

Image
  Sarah's recommended reading list: Top 5 books for disability, law and awareness: 1. Fake Law : The Truth About Justice in an Age of Lies - The Secret Barrister. How our system decides who can live and who can die and how it actually works against us and was never implemented to protect us. 2. Disability Rights Handbook: Disability Rights Handbook Edition 48 April 2023 - April 2024. The modern day up to date rights for all disabled people. 3. Helping you to identify and understand Autism Masking - Emma Kendell. A great insight into autism and how well some individuals, especially females, mask it. 4. The complex PTSD treatment manual - Arielle Schwartz, PHD. For a psychiatrist but equally as valuable to any reader, this book explores detailed ways on how to overcome traumatic experiences. 5. Confessions of a G.P - Dr Benjamin Daniels. This one is more about the lack of education with Drs and how dismissive they are of people they believe are psychosomatic or emotionally linked to

Educate yourself and keep going:

Image
 I have just signed up to an 'Understanding Autism' level 2 online course run by Lincoln College. I appreciate the fact they're running this online because it will be an excellent addition to my curriculum vitae and experience and will only help me to support my community better.  I am also looking into a course via BAColl which I'll have to enroll after this one, which is in Learning Disabilities and will act more of a refresher as I have physical experience as well as education in nursing with Learning Disabilities. You can always learn more and achieve more as long as you're passionate and driven with all you do. This is just a lady saying to you, keep at it, focus on your goals and take all the education you can get your hands on! If I can do it, so can you! πŸ™ŒπŸΌπŸ©· Sarah Wingfield Author

Step towards goals every day: πŸ’ͺ🏼🩷

Image
I'm keeping super busy, sending my DVLA old provisional license off for a new one, so I can work towards getting a motability car. Doing a business master class webinar that's focused on chronic pain. Applying for the Learning Disabilities level 2 course at BAcoll which will be an educational refresher and certification that will only add to my learning disabilities nurse cadetship experience and qualifications. I start my level 3 towards my Criminology Degree in September. Looking into better educational options for my son, as he's likely ADHD. I think I can finally check some things off the 'make myself proud' list as part of my CBT journalling, and I've been continuing with my art and applying for many jobs so you never know! I have my business plan advisor on call any second and I'm almost finished the business plan so I'm pleased with all of my progress. Especially with working around my disability and continuing with decluttering my home and I even

NO:

Image
 Today I'm saying NO. No to people who can't consider me. No to people who think they have free access to me and abuse it. No to anyone who makes me feel more alone. No to date sabotaging, the second time in two months. I don't care I will be better on my own because then people can't put me in situations I don't want to be in, they can't ruin my pain management and rest, they can't impact me badly anymore. I'm putting myself first. Hate me, doesn't change anything, I've always stood alone and even then managed to stand for others that society has abandoned, so if one person can help others think what a community can do. But I am saying NO. And this is about me and what I need. So I'm not going to apologise for it. S. X Kawaii Doll Decora 🩷✨ @KawaiiDollDecora ♡ www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk ♡

Moving forward with or without support:

Image
I'm getting angrier and angrier tbh at Tony Beddard and what he put... I prefer genuine disabled advocacy where people have morals not people who condone abuse as long as they get promoted. ADM hasn't reached out to me so I guess I'm done with that part of my life. I will surround myself with genuine people who won't condone abuse or aggression and genuinely advocate for the disabled whether or not they get promoted by the aggressor or not. People need to think about who they surround themselves with and what they stand for and I prefer authenticity and the protection of the disabled over people who don't care if someone disabled is mistreated as long as they get promoted via their media tools. I'm disappointed but I'm moving forward with or without support. Thank you Tony for showing me what you and ADM actually stand for, Disability Advocating is more than promoting, it's advocating for the support and well-being of the disabled and no matter who owns

Little wins deserve to be celebrated too!

Image
Celebrating gratitude is often targeted by people who aren't happy and need to attack anyone whose genuinely happy or atleast trying to be. Some of us are looking at life through a different lens and that's okay, you don't have to like it, that's okay too, but acting so morally superior to the point of going out of one's way to be derogatory or project false narratives just to feel intellectually superior, feed an ego or because you just enjoy being condescending is not okay. People who go out of their way to be negative and unsupportive, mean and rude, aren't worthy of your space or your time. Keep celebrating the little wins and let them be angry that they can't understand you or see how you view the world, and keep surrounding yourself with those who can! Hard work is important and we all need to work hard towards our goals and little wins matter! You are only responsible for how you behave in your life, not how others choose to. Stay kind to your mind. -

Mat 24th incident update:

Image
 ~I will never understand why people are so cruel~ I left a review on the Newton Press website via my Google and it reads as follows: I got off the phone to Paul Howarth yesterday, whilst I'm with my son in public in a cafe, the ADM meet didn't go ahead, but we stayed anyway and my son encouraged me to merely enquire about the article and why my image was not printed, Paul stated it was a space issue but I explained he'd spliced images before and how much would it cost to get the photo in the paper so I can feel positively represented by my home town as a Newtonian since his only reason was the article was FREE, anyway he got rude and abruptly stated he does a LOT for ADM and it's ALL FREE and that he feels I'm being REALLY UNFAIR and hung up on me. I am mortified that someone so unprofessional runs our local newspaper, as a disability advocate separate from ADM I deserve fair representation for my hard work and advocacy too. I allowed him to yell at me hoping I cou

Art Therapy:

Image
After six hours she is finally finished: Harajuku Bang Girl. Don't worry her magick gun only shoots love, unless she's killing monsters then it's lead! 🩷 @KawaiiDollDecora ♡ www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk ♡ #comic #comiccharacter #monsterkiller #shootslove  #kawaii #art #harajuku #harajukuart #artwork #kawaiiart  #kawaiidolldecora #spreadpositivity #love #cute #colourful #japaneseaesthetic #Fashion 

🫢🏼 love and hugs 🫢🏼

Image
I'm taking a break from social media for a bit and taking a bit of isolation time. Just focusing on my goals and continuing making progress albeit slow progress.                     🐒🐒🐒🐒🐒🐒🐒🐒 I'll be back after the breather. S. xo KawaiiDollDecora 🩷✨  ~Sometimes stepping back is necessary to process and heal~

Had a bad day, πŸ˜” sorry:

Image
I just got off the phone to Paul Howarth whilst I'm with my son in public in a cafe, I don't think the ADM meet is on but my son encouraged me to merely enquire about the article and why my image was not printed, Paul stated it was a space issue but I explained he'd spliced images before and how much would it cost to get the photo in the paper so I can feel positively represented by my home town as a Newtonian since his only reason was the article was FREE, anyway he got rude and abruptly stated he does a LOT for ADM and it's ALL FREE and that he feels I'm being REALLY UNFAIR and hung up on me. I am mortified that someone so unprofessional runs our local newspaper, as a disability advocate separate from ADM I deserve fair representation for my hard work and advocacy too. As a blogger and a Newtonian Born and Bred I'm gutted at the lack of respect, lack of compassion and I was even willing to pay for representation because REPRESENTATION MATTERS! I'm very dis

Job applications getting sillier and sillier:

Image
 Since when did you have to change silly profile info when you've actually applied for a volunteer position, this world makes no sense, no wonder people hire the wrong people, twine won't let free accounts apply for jobs if the free limit is reached and reach volunteering, despite me stating I'd volunteer from home and filling out the whole application for a position that seemed interesting, won't take my application until I change my profile from paid voluntary work to unpaid. I prefer paid so I'm leaving it as paid.  ( I need paid!! ) If I apply for a volunteering role that's unpaid that means I made that decision to apply, there's absolutely no need to reject a whole application that's separate from a profile, just because of a preference for paid work. We need to survive! With the system like this, I apply mostly on indeed but Rishi thinks getting a job is easy, he hasn't a clue about the rigmarole of applications, to be honest some jobs are pret

A simple apology and acknowledgement can make ALL the difference:

Image
  The image above is the letter of the beautiful apology I have received on behalf of Durham County Council. Sometimes just acknowledgement, understanding and a simple apology can make all the difference. I wish everyone could apologise when they make mistakes, people are fallible and what shows that they are a decent human being is how they choose to handle the mistakes they made. An apology can make all the difference. Thank you to Durham County Council for their help with this matter and hopefully other people with disabilities will be able to be supported via the Do It Online system as well as via telephone. The letter above reads: "Dear Sarah  I am writing in respect of the recent bulky collection you requested via Durham County Council. I understand you made a request for some bulky items to be removed from your property and unfortunately the collection did not take place.  The collection crew arrived at your property on the given date, and as the items were not at the expec

DVLA rigmarole:

Image
Wow, the DVLA don't 'alf make it difficult for disabled people to renew a provisional license! I'm trying to take the steps forward to sort out transportation for myself so I can attend college easier and trade at market stall events. I'm waiting for the form in the post now and I need to send my Decree Absolute to them as well as proof of identity etc. Slow process but the sooner I get this done the sooner I can either apply for the Wheels 2 Work County Durham scheme and get a scooter to study for college and for transportation at £35/week or try and get a motability car in which my pip would be deducted from. Hopefully I'll get this all sorted as soon as possible, it's a shame that I can't just email my Decree Absolute with a photograph of my ID and old provisional to get a new one. Considering all the technological advances we have to date and the fact that court documents like my Decree Absolute is released from the court in digital format, you'd thi

After an exhausting two days:

Image
I managed to get a lot done that was on my to do list and I'm keeping going, The council sorted a second rebooking of the rebooked bulky waste and it's finally gone (THANK YOU SO MUCH) It's made a huge difference to my mental health as I can clean up my garden now. ☺️🫢🏼 Allegedly Darlington council just takes it from gardens or kerbside but I can't confirm this at this time, just someone who lives there mentioned it to me. Anyways I hope the do it online system is updated to support more disabled people. I have an hours workshop booked in today about home education and ADHD which I hope will help me in regards to my son and I signed up to a beta testing of a business course worth £2000 and got accepted, hopefully it will help me as much as my feedback and testimonials will help the team! I am confused at how 'transformative' Wirestock want the image edits to be because I've changed hands, arms, and all sorts, I work better when told specifics and I don'

Stigma:

Image
Stigma: The problem is with things like this..is the fact that you aren't around those who you think are faking 24/7, (or assume haven't had bad experiences), you know only what they've told you, some people take their abuse to the grave with them πŸ˜•, others like me shout it from the rooftops to eradicate stigma on survivors and show people that they're not alone.  The mental health support and the system needs to do better and I think if they did a mandatory personality test before hiring any 'care' staff, they'd rule out most sadists and opportunists that take advantage of the power they have or lash out on those they should be protecting...in my personal opinion. I want to see my community get stronger, Aycliffe be happier and until we stop allowing the media and ego to influence our decisions, we can't start being a real team cause the world is going to πŸ’© whether people want to believe it or not, and sitting idly by and letting it is just something

Durham County Council...😞:

Image
...Exhausted...!! The Bulky waste collection was not collected and a neighbour saw a collection van pull up outside my property and look over and then go to the bottom, turn around, park up again outside my property, stare at my property from the van and drive away. I called the council around midday which I thought would be ample time for them to communicate with their staff. However, it's 10pm and the bulky waste is still there. I ended up sat on the floor at the end of my driveway crying cause I just can't deal... I mean ...when you're constantly fighting pain and trying to change everything for yourself and others, for the better, and there's obstacles thrown at you and some just seem more stubborn than others to be removed, it drains you. I mean I'm working super hard and fighting super hard to make things better and I just don't deserve to have so much of my time wasted trying to get something I'd paid for, over a month ago, to get done. Considering I&

(INTJ-T mixed with INFJ-A)- Myers Briggs test.

Image
 (INTJ-T mixed with INFJ-A)- Myers Briggs test. I seem to be a mixture of both of these personality types and I have found it very insightful, it explains weaknesses and strengths and gives me an understanding of myself and an idea of how to improve. Here's some information about both of these types and some insight into who and how I am as an individual. Thank you for reading. S. KawaiiDollDecora 🩷 ✨  @KawaiiDollDecora ♡ www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk ♡

Fixed it: πŸ˜‚πŸ’€

Image
Article written by Phillip Hawkins. Article from The Newton News Newspaper, Newton Aycliffe, UK. Friday 17th March 2024, page 9.  *My image was not printed even though Andrew Hill sent it over but the article Phillip wrote was really lovely and spreads the news of my upcoming book in which I hope to include a diverse range of people with a diverse range of experiences, to help the readers really grasp what different conditions are like for different people.* Thank you for all of your support, you know who you are, fellow creatives, advocates, supporters, without you I would not have made it this far and together we can definitely action positive change! πŸ™ŒπŸΌ✨ 🩷🩷🩷 We need people in power who understand the reality of those they govern. I'm working on a Disability Awareness book if you want to get involved, I'm an author, artist, blogger and disability advocate: www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk see book projects it will be published on Amazon for people to read for free and contr

My article in the Newton News:

Image
My article in the Newton News: My image wasn't printed even though Andrew sent it to them, but Phillip wrote a beautiful article about myself and the work I do. I'm here, I'm staying and I will constantly be making progress for myself and others with disabilities and invisible illnesses. This is the image that Andrew sent to print of me in the Newton News, Your Local Community Magazine and the actual article that was printed. Thank you to everyone who has supported me on my journey and if you do want to help to change the world and action positive change please do contact me to share your own personal experiences with invisible conditions to help others to understand. Awareness is the key to change. S xx Kawaii Doll Decora 🩷 ✨  🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷 @KawaiiDollDecora ♡ www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk ♡ 🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷

Life is hard enough for me..

Image
I was looking forward to getting ready and that for CLIFFECON but after all the bs* yesterday I just want to stay away from everyone and isolate for like a week... πŸ˜” I get people won't and don't understand but I'm fed up of trying to rest for things and then obstacles been thrown in my way. I already missed the ADM disco and food festival yesterday due to a bad pain flare up and I just want to curl up in bed which I can't because of the 'slats' issue.  I missed the catalogue call back yesterday so I wasn't able to tell them that the email they gave me to send evidence is blocking my email and I just don't feel cared about right now. I'm managing a lot of things and trying to sort a lot of things and I'm always alone in doing all of this and it's not easy but a little support my way wouldn't go amiss. Guess it's just me against everything again... ..I'm tired.... S x KawaiiDollDecora 🩷 ✨  *The bs involved neighbors disrespecting

Think for yourself:

Image
  Image reads: "One of the biggest mistakes in life is to allow yourself to be recruited by someone to hate another human being who has never wronged you. Only fools inherit other people's enemies as some weird sign of loyalty. - the mind unleashed" Think for yourself. Do your own research. Don't people please to the point of losing yourself. Don't hate people who haven't wronged you unless there are extenuating circumstances (they abused your friend etc) The people stabbing them in the back right now and causing hate campaigns will do the exact same thing to you as soon as you're no longer 'beneficial' to them. Stay out of this schoolyard mindset and just start to focus on the positives and try and actually ENJOY and appreciate life. S. Xoxo Kawaii Doll Decora 🩷 ✨  @KawaiiDollDecora ♡ www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk ♡ 🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷

Appreciation is important:

Image
So as I'm a fellow 'dullard' in all the Dull Men's and Dull Women's groups on Facebook, I have an interest in a lot of things others would probably yawn at. Ahaha. I'm the neurodivergent that read the dictionary for fun lol as a kid, and with the progress of my Criminology Degree I decided to attend my home towns Council meeting. A new mayor was announced and they went over the itinerary and their agendas. I couldn't help but be fascinated by all of the old coats of arms and photographs on the walls and I would have loved to have had someone go through all of those including the mayor and mayoress pictures and told me all about them! Maybe one day ahaha. But, I sought help from two council men that were in attendance so I thought it best to thank them in person and show my appreciation for their support with my bulky waste fight with Durham County Council. When I first arrived I was shocked to see that my disability group was there, All Disabilities Matter a

Exciting times ahead!

Image
Don't ask me how my star meter / popularity is blowing up like this! 467k popularity, but I'm definitely excited! 😊  Exciting times ahead for sure! ...if only I'd have got that job with EE I would be more financially secure and able to pursue more of my dreams and support fellow creatives even more, and yet a job I can do blindfolded didn't happen, so I guess maybe I was meant for other things and starting my website up and moving towards a sole tradership as my life is definitely speeding off in all aspects of creative avenues right now! The universe works in mysterious ways! Like I said, their loss, determination and hard work will always achieve results and I know my worth even if other companies fail to see it. Watch out cause there's definitely more to come from this northern lass!!! I'm only just getting started!! ✨✨✨ S.W..xoxo @KawaiiDollDecora ♡ www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk ♡ If the video doesn't play you can view it at: https://youtube.com/shorts/

Daggers Inn:

Image
Get involved in the production of this epic new movie Daggers Inn! https://www.facebook.com/share/p/5WhQmxfQHWrSHKnT/ https://rayafilms.com/funding-and-investment?fbclid=IwY2xjawCwHO9leHRuA2FlbQIxMQABHSmSL4WysiNrK1fN4Sv8AR__C6sgwaxlqz33HQ-67dGjs5oz5Wv-9b2xug_aem_AZ6B31LGcGyTYfoL8uJvLKQUQrH9IpUVP7Peh8RO4Pq4wqMRGxU3T9xOMW_DN-XsLCUtl5C-LPvMEnhRFkZY_kXE Both links provide more information! I'm an associate producer of this and I'm so excited about it! It features an amazing lady I know @misscharliebond (IG) and I did a shout out for it on the radio recently! It's by @rayafilmslondon (IG) so get involved, share as much as possible and become part of something awesome! -Sarah Wingfield  @KawaiiDollDecora ♡ www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk ♡ 🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷

A weight has finally be lifted:

Image
After a huge fight for a rebooking, I've finally had news today, after having to go to two councilmen and an ombudsman, that Durham County Council has finally allowed me a rebook and that the mess that has been left in my garden RE: Bulky waste will finally be gone. I could cry. Seeing that every single day and having to deal with it impacted my mental health pretty badly and made me feel worse about my home when inside I'm making real progress with organising everything and decluttering. I can finally see major progress and it's keeping me determined to continue, but this whole fiasco with the bulky waste just put a huge dampner on everything and has had me feeling like a failure and getting angry at the furniture in my garden. I'm definitely ADHD because I have so many of those traits and it's so hard to explain to people because they aren't wired like you and don't understand. People don't understand how mental health and disabilities can be interlink

I had such a good time:

Image
So I did! I braved it and I went on the radio to talk about my upcoming book and disability awareness. I did a shout out to Rayas Films London's movie Daggers Inn and where people can get involved with production! Talked about communication and social media too and how it can and has impacted communication in real life. Overall it was a good show and my canvas is going to be on their wall of fame! I'm just continuing working hard towards my goals and they've asked me back on! I'll be in the Newton News Newspaper this Friday and I keep fighting the good fight to raise awareness and I'm still volunteering for AGE UK. I finally feel like I'm moving forward in all the right ways and looking forward to college again in September! Small steps do achieve Big Goals!  KawaiiDollDecora 🩷 ✨  🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷

I prefer honesty but ...

Image
The problem is that people don't like honesty, they don't want things being pointed out to them, they want to stay in their bubble of what they think the world is like and anything and anyone that challenges that is worthy of attack, abuse or worse, in their eyes. I don't point out the patterns I see or the things I notice for fun, they're just observations, and if I feel they're damaging overall or adding to a stigma, I feel like I have every right to point them out. I never asked anyone to argue the toss with me, I never asked anyone to twist what I said to fit their own skewed narratives, but yet people will and do. People won't understand and it's not my job to try and get them to. All I can do is point out the issues I see and then whatever they take from that is theirs and theirs alone. Yet it's easier to drag someone through the mud than it is to see that they're correct with their observations. Just life, but if you want to change the world f

...a reminder:

Image
Well I did.. I was bedbound/housebound and thought I would d!3 soon... ...so thank you to myself and the universe for working through the most difficult aspects of life... We got here... And there's more to come... Sarah Kawaii Doll Decora 🩷✨  🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷

So excited! ☺️

Image
  Tune into Aycliffe Radio this Sunday the 12th May! I am so excited to announce I'm guest starring. ☺️ I'll be talking about the upcoming book on raising awareness of different disabilities and I'm still seeking people to contribute! You can see more about the book project on the website: www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk Hope to hear from more contributors soon! S. KawaiiDollDecora 🩷 ✨ 

I will never understand the need to be a D:

Image
It's so ridiculous when you get 'gang mentality' online. If adults behave this way you can't expect kids not to. I make valid points and people are welcome to disagree what I don't condone is abuse, name calling and hateful laugh reacts. I'm not your entertainment, people forget there are whole a$$ people behind the screens and real lives that are impacted by negative affiliations. This is not the only story that I've seen where cannabis needn't have been mentioned in the headline.  ..but like I said that's just my opinion and atleast I don't go around laugh reacting people to get a sadistic 'kick' to my weekend. I can't expect people who like to be abusive to care and I definitely can't expect everyone to understand. The online world is pathetic most days but today, it's made me ashamed to be from the same area as the people who can't see the issue here. If the bro was on PRESCRIPTION MEDS for pain whilst on the bike I do

Forgive others for not understanding but don't give them space in your life:

Image
 Mello Lotus (profile on Facebook) Girl been there, I've loved people who made me genuinely believe I deserve to be beaten up, I've fought for people who have abused me financially and physically, never again. I got taught a hellova lesson young and I've been trying to gain my balance in this world ever since! Other people and how they perceive you, portray you, belittle you, judge you, just tells you everything about them and nothing about you. Some people need to gain some information before opening their mouths. ...and even worse those that laugh or cause harm to you or lie or disbelieve you, you still hope they never end up in your shoes...  @KawaiiDollDecora #kindnessmatters 

More negative affiliations:

Image
I shared a post today about a man that chose to drive dangerously on an off road bike and killed a cyclist. πŸ˜₯ Heartbreaking! πŸ’”  Articles will be attached at the bottom of this post but this is a screenshot: Anyways my point got the attention of a dude in the wrong ways:  I wish people understood my points or asked for clarification: πŸ€£πŸ’€πŸ‘€ Cannabis doesn't make people choose to drive off road bikes dangerously bro, that's a peoples choice thing so I don't know why they even needed to mention it in the article, oh wait , yes I do, because they will do their best to keep NEGATIVE affiliations with cannabis that actually impact peoples lives because people like me are prescribed it! I don't deserve external judgement from bs stigma and negative affiliations spoonfed to people, so forgive me if I want news to be more 'relevant'. But yea, I'm the 'doyle' clearly... Lmao.. πŸ’€πŸ’€πŸ’€ (Name removed) tbh your profile had a lot of cool shii like pogz so if I ha