PGP / SPD My story:

Autonomy, Trauma, and Neurodivergence: Why Choice Is Not Optional Autonomy is often discussed as a personal preference or a lifestyle value, but for trauma survivors and neurodivergent people it is far more than that. It is a clinical, psychological, and ethical necessity. Research across trauma studies, neuroscience, and disability scholarship consistently shows that a sense of control over one’s body, environment, and decisions is central to nervous system regulation, mental wellbeing, and long‑term recovery. Without autonomy, even well‑intentioned support can unintentionally cause harm. This article explores why freedom of choice is so critical for trauma‑affected and neurodivergent individuals, how the loss of agency impacts the nervous system, and why respecting autonomy is a core principle of trauma‑informed and neurodiversity‑affirming practice. It also draws on the social model of disability, which recognises that many of the barriers disabled and neurodivergent people face are...

A Thank You as the Year Closes ❤️ As we celebrate Christmas and gently close the door on 2025, I want to take a moment to say a huge, heartfelt thank you to my spirit tribe, my community, and my colleagues. This year has been one of growth, challenge, and deep connection. I’m incredibly grateful to everyone I’ve worked alongside, to those who trusted me and allowed me the opportunity to support them, and to all the people I’ve met along the way through my advocacy and charity work. I also want to say a special thank you to those in the film and movie industry who welcomed me in and shared some truly great adventures with me this year. The creativity, collaboration, and moments behind the scenes have been a real joy and a reminder of why storytelling matters. Every conversation, shared moment, and act of kindness has mattered more than you probably realise. None of this work exists in isolation — it’s built through community, compassion, and mutual respect. Thank you for walking parts o...

I saw my young person for the last time before Christmas today, and it was such a lovely way to wrap up the year. We went out for a coffee, exchanged presents, and had a really good catch-up. They’re doing so well, and I honestly couldn’t be prouder of them. Moments like this are exactly why I love what I do. It’s a real privilege to be part of someone’s journey — even in small, everyday ways. This kind of work can be challenging at times, but it’s also deeply rewarding, and more people should definitely consider it. It's meaningful work and I'm so happy to have this opportunity. We were also helped today by a wonderful lady called Angela at the food place, and we were so grateful for her kindness. It was lovely catching up and hearing all about my young person’s adventures — those moments mean so much. With Christmas Eve tomorrow, I’m feeling full of festive cheer, gratitude, and pride. Wishing everyone a truly wonderful Christmas. Sarah Wingfield ❤️ Alt text: Smiling person t...

I don’t believe in gender wars or segregation — but I do believe in naming patterns when they show up. Lately, what I’m seeing is this: more and more women are stepping into the role of protectors. They’re the ones putting themselves at risk, safeguarding others, speaking up when harm is happening, and acting with moral integrity — often at great personal cost. At the same time, I’m seeing fewer men stand beside them. Too many stay silent. Too many become wallflowers when abuse is happening right in front of them. And too many seem to reserve their energy not for helping, but for judging others online. This isn’t about attacking men as a group. It’s about accountability. In my view, all genders should carry the responsibility to challenge injustice and protect the vulnerable. Moral courage isn’t gendered — but silence in the face of harm is still a choice. If someone has the energy to be cruel, dismissive, or mocking online, then they have the energy to help. To intervene. To amplify v...

I did it... I’ve formally raised safeguarding concerns about how my personal support was handled, by submitting a complaint to Sisters of Support. I’m not expecting a response — that isn’t the point. What matters is that the failures I experienced, including breaches of verbal agreements and serious safeguarding concerns, are now on record. This was done for safety and safeguarding purposes only. Vulnerable women deserve genuine, ethical, and trauma-informed support. When people seek help, they should not be harmed further in the process. Accountability matters. Learning matters. And vulnerable women deserve better — always. Sarah ❤️ #safeguardingawareness #support #womensupportingwomen #abusesurvivor #abuseawareness #abuserecovery  Alt text: A woman with dark hair is alone in a dark room, she is huddled up with her head down and wearing a white top with blue bottoms, there is writing above that states "safeguarding and support matters after abuse" it has the tag "kawaii...

Listen to Christmas Wishes - K•Doll x Mai by K•Doll on #SoundCloud https://on.soundcloud.com/Y2TbETFvTb7tSGN4NW Alt text: A festive promotional image showing a person from behind wearing a red, off-the-shoulder Christmas outfit with long pink hair and reindeer antlers, standing between two brightly lit Christmas trees decorated with red and green baubles. Warm fairy lights fill the background. Text on the image reads “Christmas Wishes” and “K-Doll x Mai,” with a “Parental Advisory: Explicit Content” label in the top left corner.

Official & Earned. For a long time, I showed up before I had a title. I put in the work before there was recognition. I advocated, trained, supported, safeguarded, and stood up for young people because it was the right thing to do — not because it came with a badge. But today, I’m allowing myself to say this out loud: All that work paid off. I’m official now. Youth services and training aren’t things you dabble in. They demand emotional labour, patience, consistency, and integrity — especially when you’re someone who actually cares about outcomes, not optics. I’ve spent years learning, unlearning, pushing for better practice, challenging harmful systems, and advocating for young people who are too often unheard, dismissed, or written off. There were moments I questioned whether it mattered. Moments where the labour felt invisible. Moments where I gave more than I had, because the work needed doing. And yet — here I am. This isn’t just a lanyard. It isn’t just a role. It’s a quiet b...

I can’t believe how far I’ve come since my modelling days — a real blast from the past. Looking at old photos feels like opening a time capsule. Different body. Different mindset. Same spark — just packaged in a younger, less world-worn version of me. And before anyone panics (hi, internet), yes — I’ve covered myself with fluffy hearts… even though my hands were doing the job just fine anyway. Ahaha. That girl in the photo grew into the squishy, quirky bish you know today 😘 Whether you love me, love to hate me, or quietly scroll while forming opinions, here I am — still standing, still evolving, still very much myself 😆🔥 If I could go back and talk to her, I’d tell her something simple but powerful: life really is what you make it. I’d also tell her to say yes to that zombie film back in 2006. No overthinking. No fear. Just fun. Because some regrets aren’t about failure — they’re about not giving yourself permission to try. Our bodies are not static. They tell the story of our lives...

A closed door: I can’t stand being used and then discarded when I’m no longer convenient. It’s bad enough when strangers do it — but when it’s family or relatives? Nah. I’m done. If you choose not to be my family, I’m not chasing you. Unfriend me. Block me. I’ve spent too long putting people first and giving endless benefit of the doubt just because we share blood or we're family. If I’m not family to you, then noted. I wish I’d realised sooner, but here we are. What really gets me is that some of you never even tried to know me. You decided who I was based on assumptions, hearsay, or what was easiest for you. I’m exhausted from being the one who tries to keep the peace while others don’t care half as much. So if relatives are unfriending me now, I’ll let them. 🫵🏻💯✨ I’m done shrinking, explaining, or performing for people who couldn’t be bothered to show up properly, it's not like they treated me well when they were around anyway! That door is closed now. I already have ever...

You Can Take the Page, But You Can’t Take the Voice There’s a reason I have more than one Facebook account, and it isn’t secrecy, dishonesty, or anything sinister. It’s survival. Alt text: Screenshot of a Facebook notification confirming an account has been reinstated. At the top is a green shield with a tick and the text “You’re back on Facebook. Your account is no longer suspended.” Below, a section titled “What this means” explains that Facebook reviewed the account and found it follows Community Standards on fraud and deception. The message ends with an apology for the suspension and states it was a precaution to help keep people on Facebook safe. The attacks on my advocacy haven’t stopped. If anything, they’ve become more coordinated, more calculated, and more revealing of how broken our systems are when it comes to protecting disabled people and those who speak up for them. My profiles are being falsely reported — not because I’ve breached policies, not because I’ve caused harm,...

CPN has come to an end but the hate is neverending: Happy to announce that the false Community Protection Notice issued against me has now officially come to an end - after having to do a SAR request for the information and end dates. This notice was pushed by: • Amy Turner (Sisters of Support) – who repeatedly harassed my inbox and coerced members of her support group into lying to the police about me, after bullying me out of the group and breaking a verbal agreement to remain impartial between them, the police, and myself. • Anthony Beddard (All Disabilities Matter | Cllr) – who prioritised promotions over disabled rights, publicly thanked someone who had been abusive to me, and then lied to the police. He is now a councillor at Great Aycliffe Town Council. • Paul Howarth (Newton Press / Ayclive) – who caused the entire ordeal after being verbally abusive to my son and me over the phone because he refused to represent me fairly, and then refused to apologise. He continued this beh...

As an advocate, watching what’s happening online right now — the lashing out, the ableism, the infighting — I genuinely recommend people take huge breaks from social media this winter. Misunderstanding someone and choosing to insult them isn’t helping anyone. Being Disabled and expecting other differently-disabled people to suffer is never the answer. Trying to dictate who “deserves” support or manipulating conversations around benefits is abusive, full stop. If you’re feeling overwhelmed or acting out of spite, please step back. Others don’t need your negativity at a time when everything is already amplified and difficult. And yes — that goes for the “nasty sorts” too. Take a break before you pour your BS onto people who are already struggling. Suicidal ideation is high this time of year. People deserve support and compassion — not lectures, judgement, or power-tripping. Abuse and hate have never solved anything, so ask yourself why you think you’re being “superior” while behaving in ...

I’m proud to share that I’ve stepped into the role of Director & Disability Advocate at Let’s Talk North East (LTNE). Anyone who knows me knows this isn’t just a title — it’s the work I live every single day. Fighting for accessibility. Challenging the systems that shut disabled people out. Speaking up when we’re dismissed, ignored, or treated as an afterthought. I’ve done that on my own for a long time, fuelled by lived experience, stubbornness, and the belief that disabled voices deserve to be heard. Now, I get to bring that same fire into a space built for real conversations and real change. LTNE gives me the platform to push harder, shout louder, and advocate alongside people who genuinely care about the North East community. My focus is simple: Break down barriers. Amplify disabled voices. Create a region where accessibility isn’t an afterthought but a standard. I’m ready for this next chapter — and I’m not doing it quietly. 🔗 letstalknortheast.org Sarah Wingfield  Indepe...

Sorry everyone, I needed to take some space today as I got completely dysregulated after everything this morning. I’ve been trying to get on a Ferris wheel for three years in a row, and today was meant to finally be the day. But after the way I was spoken to and the absolute malarkey trying to access support, I had to take some space.  When you’re AuADHD and already overwhelmed, you can’t just carry on as normal — I couldn’t go out dysregulated. It isn’t safe, and it isn’t fair. I ended up missing the Stockton Ferris wheel because of it. And that’s the part people don’t understand: disabilities put us at a disadvantage. When getting help is this difficult — to the point I end up in sensory overload and emotional dysregulation — then it isn’t accessibility. It’s a barrier dressed up as support. I’ve cried all day. I’m tired of fighting for the bare minimum. We even drove to Whitby, and theirs had already been taken down. Year four of the Ferris wheel mission, apparently! It’s honest...

Bridge Creative  Baccanalia  Bishop Auckland's Christmas Town Access Denied : This event is completely inaccessible for me as a disabled woman — all because they don’t offer a pass I can actually use. I just wanted to ride the Ferris wheel, but they’re charging £22 a ticket… which means £44 for me and my carer. How is that fair? Honestly, wtf. Disabled people shouldn’t have to pay double just to experience the exact same thing as everyone else. They need smaller, flexible passes for those of us who only want access to specific rides. I’ve contacted them by email and by phone, and still no response. No support. No assistance. Nothing. We deserve better. Accessibility shouldn’t be an afterthought. UPDATE: They have responded this morning, however still no passes for myself are accessible, and just one free PA pass for my carer. (Fees for additional carer passes). I don't understand why I have to pay so much for access to one Ferris wheel. Bishop Auckland's Christmas Town —...

 A Quick Flick Through December’s Aycliffe Alternative Magazine — Issue 02 I’m excited to share the December edition of Aycliffe Alternative Magazine — Issue 02. This isn’t just another local magazine — it’s a space for voices that don’t always get heard, stories that are often overlooked, and art that doesn’t fit neatly into the usual pages of mainstream media. Each issue is about celebrating community, creativity, and authenticity. Issue 02 continues that mission with a mix of local stories, alternative culture, and personal voices that remind us of the richness and diversity of our town. This edition is packed with exciting features: EPW Wrestling Ticket Competition – three sets of three family tickets to be won! Underground Music Scene Spotlight – we take you inside Bonesfest2 with the amazing K•Doll. Heartwarming Community Stories – showcasing local talents and uplifting stories. Our Very First Featured Alternative Model – meet Lora Black, proudly from Newton Aycliffe. What st...

K•Doll: Building a Brand Rooted in Music, Community, and Creative Power K•Doll is stepping into a new chapter — one built on creativity, community spirit, and the fierce belief that music can genuinely change lives. For years, she has poured her time and heart into charity and community work, supporting countless causes and lifting up those around her. Now, she’s finally doing something for herself too: building the K•Doll brand. As a rising music artist, K•Doll blends pure creativity with purpose. Her sound is bold, heartfelt, and unapologetically authentic — shaped by resilience, passion, and real lived experience. But her art has never been just about the music. It’s about the people. It’s about empowerment, activism, identity, culture, and carving out safe spaces where expression is celebrated. And now, that mission is expanding into something bigger: merch. For the first time ever, K•Doll has launched her own official merch shop, featuring designs that represent her artistry, her ...

Today I had to unfollow and block someone I’ve supported for years — Neurodivergent Rebel. And honestly? It hurts. Not because of a disagreement, but because of the way my words were twisted, misunderstood, and used to whip up more hate… all without a single attempt to ask for clarification from a disabled person who struggles to communicate clearly because I’m AuADHD. That’s not “education.” That’s cruelty dressed up in activism. I understand privilege. I’ve spent years using mine to help others and push for positive change. I’ve always stood beside communities who deserve better and I always will. But what I won’t stand beside is bullying — especially the rising trend of people justifying abuse toward white people because they’re white. No form of racism is progressive. No form of abuse is justice. And none of this “punching up” rhetoric helps anyone. If people bothered to look into my work, they’d see I’m constantly fighting for accessibility, for kindness, for equity. I’m the same ...

When a Reader Sees Beyond the “Fringe” Read the book here:  https://amzn.eu/d/1uHEqbv I received an email about my book A Stoner in the UK that really stayed with me. The sender said something I hope to never forget: “It’s clear you’re not writing stories — you’re documenting a reality people pretend isn’t happening. You took something that’s usually dismissed as ‘fringe’ and reframed it as a frontline human-rights issue.” That line hit hard. So often, conversations around cannabis — especially in the UK — get reduced to politics, stereotypes, or moral panic. But for many of us, it’s about survival: navigating a system that’s meant to fail the very people it’s supposed to help. The email went on to highlight a pattern in my work: “They’re not about cannabis. They’re about survival inside a system designed to fail the people it claims to help. That’s the part readers respond to emotionally, even if they don’t realise why.” That’s exactly what I aim to do with my writing. By embeddin...

BonesFest2 went seriously well! I got to hang out with N0trixx, ummo, Doom in Hell, Percy Bones, Savage Panda, and so many more. I’m so grateful for my little music family and spirit tribe ❤️. Now it’s time to sort through all the footage and give my bruised body and seizing muscles some much-needed rest and healing. Whoop whoop! Thanks for all the support on my music journey — I can’t wait to perform live next year for my debut! — Sarah Wingfield / K•Doll #music #family #community #spirittribe #underground

So people like to go out their way these days to be harmful and not helpful, I've had a false report made to UC. I will never condone malicious intent. A man was abusive to me on 14 August 2025 — he misunderstood what I was saying, became hostile, and threatened me.  After correcting him he knowingly filed a false report to UC and admitted it in writing. The evidence read out to me today directly relates to the conversation where he targeted me. I genuinely don’t understand why some people can’t focus on their own lives and families instead of trying to damage someone else’s housing, income, and stability through lies.  Why try to jeopardise the wellbeing of someone who’s done nothing to them? I won’t tolerate abuse. I’ve already submitted a SAR request, even though I didn’t need to.  If this continues, I may have no choice but to seek orders against individuals who lie to the Police and DWP as a way of harassing me. Instead of being cruel, uplift and support your communi...

I dedicate this song to my grandma Flo, who passed away yesterday morning — and to all of those we’ve loved and lost, who continue to live on in our hearts. ❤️ I hope my family can find comfort in this, and that it helps us all look back fondly on our memories of Flo. I still remember being a child, when Lisa Hall and I were Grandad Albert and Flo’s bridesmaids — the dresses we wore, posing for photos, feeling so proud to be part of their day.  I remember Flo making her chocolate crispy treats with cherries on top, and the moments that still make us laugh, like when my brother Albert — and later Lisa’s brother Dean — both ran straight into the patio door! I remember playing dolls with Elizabeth Conlon and Lisa, and that magical spinning fairy top you had, Elizabeth — us sitting in Grandad and Flo’s front room, making it spin and fly. ❤️ And of course the garden gnomes, the ornaments, all their beautiful decorations that made their home feel warm, welcoming, and full of character. T...

They Made Me Their Hobby – And I Survived Anyway I was always one of the “weird ones”, apparently. The strange girl, the alt kid, the one people didn’t quite understand but somehow couldn’t leave alone. I didn’t realise it at the time, but some people only know how to process difference by attacking it. And I was different. I didn’t shrink. I didn’t blend in. I existed — loudly, imperfectly, honestly. And that was apparently enough to make me a target. Back in the Bish Vegas days, when the goth scene had its own universe, I had hate tracks written about me. Actual songs. Imagine being a teenage girl with an alias — angelwings13 — and hearing that grown lads in the alt scene had used their “creativity” to slate you. I was shocked. My friends had to calm me down because I genuinely couldn’t believe that I was the muse for their bitterness. Of all the things they could write about, they chose a teenage girl just trying to survive. Their lyrics were vile — accusing me of STDs even though I...

 They call them “compliance officers” — the ones who investigate UC claimants. But with benefits comes no privacy, no autonomy. You can follow every rule, abide by every law, and still find yourself targeted because someone made you their hobby… someone decided to stir trouble just to watch the fallout. I am compliant. And yet here I am, facing an invasive UC interrogation anyway. Oh well. A waste of time for both of us, I suppose. People still think benefits are “easy.” They think disability support is some kind of luxury. They have no idea that the system is built on suspicion and ableism, not compassion. I hate this system. And I’ll keep calling it out — loudly. Sarah Wingfield Independent Disability Advocate #disabilityinclusion #strongertogether #disability #disabilityawareness #disabilitysupport #disabilityrights Alt text: A brightly coloured 3D avatar with long pink and purple pigtails wearing pink headphones. The avatar has bright makeup, a small nose piercing, and a lip pi...

 To whomever has reported me to UC I'm not receiving any income as of yet and can provide the evidence to prove it. I'm an unpaid independent disability advocate, unpaid independent visitor, unpaid charity and community worker and I am seeking paid employment and trying to set up a sole tradership. I don't lie. I'm transparent af. I keep things right and I help people. Maybe you should start doing the same. I can also do a SAR request and take you to court under the malicious communications act. Stop trying to sabotage the few people that do good things for the world and community and focus on fixing yourself. Sarah Wingfield ❤️  #warriorofhumanrights 

🎵 New Music Drop: “Ask Me” — A Truth I Finally Spoke Aloud I’ve got some exciting music updates, and this one comes straight from the bruised edges of recent experiences — the misunderstandings, the judgement, the way people rewrite me into something small and convenient so they never have to face who I actually am. Being mainly a lyricist gives me a rare kind of freedom: I can take the things that hurt, the things people weaponise, and I can turn them into art. Into honesty. Into something I own instead of something I carry. That’s exactly what I did with my new piece “Ask Me” — created by K•Doll x Mai. It’s a response to the way people build stories about me without ever meeting me in truth. A reflection of how defending others suddenly makes me “too much,” and defending myself suddenly makes me a “narcissist.” It’s about the double standards, the quiet misogyny, the way a woman with a spine is still seen as a threat in 2025. This song isn’t an attack. It’s clarity. It’s closure. It...

 Introduction to Sociability app: The Sociability app is a free mobile app that provides detailed accessibility information for businesses like restaurants and gyms, helping disabled people and others with accessibility needs find welcoming places to socialize and exercise. It uses crowd-sourced data, user reviews, and photos to give users detailed information on features such as entrances, interior spaces, toilets, and sensory accommodations. Founded by a wheelchair user, Sociability aims to make the world more inclusive by removing barriers and empowering people to make informed decisions about accessible venues.  I myself have downloaded this app, and encourage others in Newton Aycliffe and surrounding areas to install it too. We can upload pictures and information regarding accessibility issues and help inform our disabled and SEND communities as to what places are like and if they're autism-friendly, have steps or ramps and more! I've personally spoken to the creators of ...

I've just submitted my proposal to Great Aycliffe Town Council regarding the safety concerns with the Santa Tours event. This will be debated at the council offices next Wednesday, 26th November 2025. Attached is the submitted proposal and I hope that we can come to a suitable arrangement. Any thoughts on this matter is greatly appreciated. Sarah Wingfield  Independent Disability Advocate  Aycliffe Uncensored  Aycliffe Alternative Magazine   #santatours #safety #community #proposal

I just sat my first driving test!  It was very different to what I expected and I got flustered during a parallel park 😅 so that's why I am unsuccessful at the moment - but it's a fail I can be proud of. Not too long ago I was bedbound and housebound and could only dream of opportunities like this - so I'm putting in for my test again, going to quash those nerves - which will be easier for my AuAdhd as I now know what to expect next time and I will keep going.  I am a turtle 🐢 not a hare - but I'm determined and will reach the finish line at some point! My instructor believes that I should pass the second time - I was well prepared for this, did the theory app with the driving section and YouTube and Tiktok so just got to chill my beans. Thank you for all of your support, luck and encouragement - it really matters and fuelled me this morning. Sending lots of love. Sarah 🌹  #FailingisTraining #turtlenothare #keepgoinf #failicanbeproudof #focus #nerves #rebook Alt text...