Hate campaigns and life lessons:

 


I never understood or ever agreed with hate campaigns, whenever I've had an issue it's been with someone or a place directly and I've only used external channels to voice my concerns or upset because they've left me no choice. 

Resolution attempts have been thwarted or I've been lied about or mistreated further. Its pointless.

I disagree with hate campaigns in their entirety and would never and will never condone that behaviour.

I boycott places personally that's toxic to me and I don't need to recruit others to do the same because behaviour has a pattern and if they can do it to me they'll do it to others and I can't change that or protect people. I could try but it would be pointless and people don't even listen, most allow bad behaviour by some of the places or people because they are beneficial to them and that's just life. 

They'll find out themselves though in the long run, I don't need to do anything. Never needed to but hate campaigns and ostracising campaigns have been lead against me personally and it's ugly AF behaviours and proves my point that they're maladaptive to begin with.

Basic behavioural psychology dictates that behaviour has a pattern so their behaviour won't change.

I am of the 'let them' mentality these days, I can't change the world by trying to get people to see my worth or others worth or how their actions are detrimental or harmful, we can lead a horse to water but we can't make it drink, and it's not my job or responsibility to.

I can only be authentic, honest and upfront and stay in alignment with my morals.

I do my best and the work I do is important and that's all that matters.

I used to support places irregardless of how they treated me but it's a waste and time of energy and it's not good safeguarding if I'm sharing and promoting people and places that I have known directly to be harmful. As much as I won't hate campaign I can't promote harmful behaviours either.

I step back.

I do a lot of uplifting and supporting of people and places and won't stop but I have changed who I choose to support and how I use my energy.

I couldn't in all honesty be okay if I found out someone I recommended a place to got harmed like I had, knowing that I had been previously harmed. It would be detrimental to my mental and emotional wellbeing. I'd feel to blame even though I'm only responsible for my actions.

I've learned a lot of lessons about cliques and ego's and of false facades for hidden agendas and I just stay in my lane and blog because the resolution I wanted hasn't been offered and some have even gone to great lengths to ostracise me and have me trolled and hated and some have even lied to the police under false justifications.

I can't change how they are or how they behave but I can change how I react to it.

I stepped away.

That's good enough for me and I sleep well at night knowing I've only ever stated the truth and the facts and problem solved and helped.

I can live with that.

If you learn anything from this blog entry, I'd like it to be that sometimes people don't see your worth and instead lash out or attack or sabotage, not because you deserve it, but because your authenticity and morals is a threat to their facade and they're terrified people will learn the truth about them.

Instead of worrying though they should change their ways so people get the best version of them and not a maladaptive version or a facade.

Some people also just don't want to apologise, don't want to acknowledge they've done wrong and attacking and belittling and invalidating you makes them feel better as it's a DARVO abuse tactic that deflects from their behaviour so people instead focus on the misinformation spread about the actual victims.

Always remember behaviour has a pattern and never tolerate less than you deserve.

Respect is not only how you treat people but how you deserve to be treated too.

Some things in life you can't change no matter how much you want to and you can't save everyone or solve all problems, it takes genuine teams with authentic intentions for actual positive change.

Have a good day and thanks again for reading.

Sarah Wingfield ❤️ xo


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