PGP / SPD My story:

  Yet people will hype up poison pushed onto you by the NHS and hate on people who need more natural remedies (even prescribed) because of stigma and the fact they're too dumb to educate themselves on things before they speak. Each hateful word used as if it's a fact when it's not. Silly people will always hate on things if they can, smart people learn about it and make an educated decision in regards to it. #medical #420positive #marijuana #marijuanaismedicine  Weed is medicinal, especially prescribed, not like half the people who claim their leisurely cocaine use is 'medicinal', don't throw stones at people when you live in glass houses. (Just a random example not a personal dig at anyone; just proving a point of hypocrisy.)

Would I have preferred a cottage in the woods next to a lake where I can write and make art and be dorky and weird and smell leaves and hug trees and roll in grass ....yes. ..but I can still make a decent little life for myself with what I currently have and all my coping methods are linked to my location and home... ..my home is all I have and I will continue to work hard to make it the best little home I can for both me and for Bud. ❤️

 People see people using this technique to beat  Depression  Chronic pain PTSD Emotional overwhelm  Sensory overload  Bad head spaces And they'll be so helpful they'll be like  "They're not suffering they're happy" and then go on to invalidate everything that person is going through simply because the person was laughing or focusing on trying to endure, cope or deal with things in a better way. #STOPinvalidating Image reads: " When you are trying to eliminate stress from your life, try to indulge your laughter as much as you possibly can. Allow and seek out avenues for it to surface. You can even begin with a smile. Smiling is the beginning of laughter. It too is contagious. It too releases endorphins. Seek out ways to develop your own sense of humour. Seek out that which is funny to you, whether it is renting a funny movie, calling up the friend who always makes you laugh or developing an arsenal of jokes to tell. As laughter becomes an integrated part o...

 When a narcissist has been outed they punish the victim. Real victims don't seek to harm the person they claimed were abusive, they are like me, hurt, dazed, confused, they don't threaten a tirade of harassment or seek to get someone evicted. If you want to know who the abuser is look at their behaviour after an altercation. The victim usually hides or calls the police, or cries or has a breakdown. The abuser continues and threatens them (it happens due to behavioural patterns)  As the verbal aggression is never enough they have to cause more harm and with intent even though they will manipulate and gaslight and make out their abuse was justified, the same as their continued abuse of it and threats will be. The victim will be fighting to get their life sorted. The narcissist will try and do things to destroy their life. If people OPENED THEIR EYES more than their EARS AND MOUTHS it's always SO obvious but being blinded by false narratives is easier than taking a step back ...

 I published my poetic short yesterday... ..keep a look out. My plans today may have been sabotaged so I can't go to the The MEGA Misfit Market (which no one would want something THEY ARE EXCITED ABOUT TO BE SABOTAGED lmao) but here we are so instead I did this last night and today I'm going to do the goals and studies I missed by being gaslit and bullied yesterday. That was really not fun. Don't you love it how people tell you that because they see you as a problem, won't gather the facts, they're allowed to be abusive, you have to be a human verbal punching bag, because THEY SEE you as the problem and they use that to justify their abuse. No matter what my friend and I did yesterday, I was going to be painted in a bad light and I kept trying to get my friend inside WITH me to get away from things because the people that came out witnessed the reaction to the abuse not the start of it. My friend also never apologised and she even tried to get the neighbour to stop ...

  If they didn't want to fight If they didn't want to be abusive Then why didn't they simply go inside like I was trying to? No one cares about the victim, they only care to flex an ego and justify what happened because it is in alignment with HOW they want to think about an individual  Let them. Facts never change. In addition: I think people manipulate and bully people with autism because they are easily reactive hence they avoid abuse, they end up overwhelming them with Sensory overload by being abusive and then when they have an autistic meltdown they're mislabeled as the abuser even though they tried to get away from the abuse. #dobetter #understandautism

Update:  I already know I'm not popular. I heard the nasty shii spewed at me today. I'm legitimately hated to the point that harming me is justified in their eyes at this point. I'm not okay. I'm alone and keep taking hits I don't need, want or deserve. I'm autistic and wired differently so I feel like I'm an alien most days, like there's this invisible wall people have and no matter what I do to prove to them what they think of me is not the case I can't penetrate that wall. So I keep taking hits and I'm going to have to keep taking hits .. just wish I could be less reactive to said hits, even though when I did take them and not react in the past, nothing changed. I will fight to the death to stay at my home and the only thing I'm sorry for today was considering someone else when working on my garden. Caring about others needs will get you shat on, hated, blamed, attacked and ganged up on and they'll cheer and say you deserve it all. The...

 None of it's ok and it won't be and I just have to accept that... nothing I can do so I'll keep taking the hits until I can't anymore... ❤️‍🩹 But until then I'll do my best to struggle on... Abuse is never justified nor ever okay and I wish I didn't get reactive because it is just used to protect abusive people and blame me for my reaction and their abuse... This isn't just about today, it's about a lot of things and as an autistic I hate conflict and abuse and want to avoid it because it gets me reactive and emotional and a lot of emotional hits were taken today and I simply feel like I've suffered enough... ...I don't expect people to understand or care or even want to sort things cause no matter how I approach things I'm still hated and I still want to avoid and stay away from conflict and abuse. I'm alone. I have no one. I'll take the hits and pick myself up cause as a mother I have no other choice... Hate me, blame me, do what ...

Ok, wasn't going to say anything but ... Coming soon! I'm excited about this one and if Mary Shelley can be inspired by bizarre dreams so can I! I'm excited about how this story is going to develop myself... ..so I don't care how long it takes to finish this. This is the book I've been working on currently. Sarah Wingfield Author 🌹 @KawaiiDollDecora ♡ https://lnkd.in/esNXgpwN ♡ ****  Aite  We follow the story of Aite, who leaves her farm life and relaxing and peaceful home on a recluse island for the scenes and sounds of the bustling city. We are by her side throughout her journey, reckless impulses and her eagerness to rushing into things headfirst; which always almost leads to nothing but trouble. Through failed romances and the tragic backstory of her mother's death, Aite becomes very familiar with loss and pain, that is until one day working at her new job at a new bar, she meets Eros and their connection only strengthens over time. Aite and Eros find tha...

I don't know why people even target me, I mean I have nothing, what more do you want from me? Or do you target me because I know my worth and expect you to be decent when you're not, or because I say NO to your abuse and pathetic sadism and excuses? I just don't understand why people thrive off wanting to harm people they don't even know just cause they can.

Update: police left, the neighbour has been warned about her behaviour but is adamant on getting a petition to get me out and was keen on blaming me for the actions of everyone around me and saying some horrendous things about things she hasn't even got a clue about, she has an issue with me and I can't change that.  No one acts like you have just murdered their dog over a piece of wood that wasn't even theirs. I've stopped trying to process and understand it and I will fight to the death to stay put in MY home. Update: waiting for the police right now . Cause I took MY post down IMPROVING MY PROPERTY and did it kindly and asked them if they wanted it and wouldn't tolerate threats or abuse or sadism my neighbour is putting a petition up to get me out of my house. (Narcissistic tendencies 101 zero accountability for tyrant behaviour) Oh and she's reporting me for my medical marijuana. Yay me. How lovely people are ..not. What do I expect from tyrants and bullies?...

 ...and I want to get off. If I didn't have bad luck I'd have no luck, the decluttering was difficult and hard and I had deadlines and a lot of medical appointments so I didn't get the study time I require and have been granted a small extension. I also knocked my freezer during decluttering so any food I had managed to store has gotten completely defrosted and went bad. The housing association didn't photograph or sort the collection so the rubbish is still in my drive.  My flare ups have been way worse and I've not even heard from the local college, a friend told me they rang and the level three policing course I need towards my degree isn't going ahead in September, and yet no one has bothered to notify me. The Facebook group for the college had 103 individuals, I was removed and it changed to 102, yet many were removed. Thanks for the RSD on that one. I may not be everyone's cuppa tea but I'm no antagonist, I'm not disrespectful and I don't s...

They tell you to water yourself down and be less disabled whilst bragging about a trophy he got for supporting disabled people. They tell you to be less disabled, and less neurospicy otherwise they won't work with you to eradicate ableism and then brag they're polishing their trophy the next day. They claim to have a disability themselves and yet refuse to wear it and accept it, hiding it half the time, and they claim to be an ally. They overlook abuse an autistic lady dealt with to try and flex and ego and got defensive when brought to their attention, so they attempted to attack by mentioning my adult erotica books. No amount of trophies will help with how your attitude is when it comes to the disabled, and without naming names I'm getting tired and exhausted from fake disability allies getting awards whilst behaving in ways that goes against the disabled community. I never asked them to hide their disability, never asked for their trophy or proof, never told them to chan...

 I wasn't happy starving to have a body that was accepted for modelling...  ... I probably caused harm to the point it's impacted my disabilities... ...girls and women need to know that being an ironing board figure doesn't change anything if they don't love who they are and won't make others love them and they'll still get called fat and worse... ... different names for every different pair of shoes... So just embrace the shoes you're in... You are the only one who can walk in them. ❤️💯 #youareallbeautiful

 Actioning positive change will attract drama. Being public on social media will attract drama. Being an outspoken woman will attract drama. Holding a mirror up to others will attract drama. Speaking up for you and others rights will attract drama. You are NOT what you attract. Drama will go to ANYONE but those who defend and are direct are the ones to really be hyped about... they keep it real even in the face of adversity...in the face of peer pressure, bullying, dictating... they keep it real. Your lack of understanding them was never their issue or problem, you're lack of respect and eagerness to swear and abuse was never their issue or problem, they won't wear the weight of actions that they're simply not responsible for ... ...and that in itself .. ...will attract drama. 💯 Sarah Wingfield Author 🌹  @KawaiiDollDecora ♡ www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk ♡

 Yea I fake being disabled: poetic writing: Image reads: Can't clean up the whole room? Clean a corner of it.  Can't do all the dishes? Do a dish.  Can't get in the shower? Wash your face.  Always look for the thing you CAN do, with the energy and focus you DO have. Little wins pave the way for bigger wins. 1% beats 0% --- "Yea, i fake being disabled": (The irony of society) Can't clean up the whole room?  Just clean a corner of it, so people who visit you in a professional capacity can speak negatively about it, every single time, different faces, judgemental words. Never actually helping you, or changing anything, but still chipping at the self esteem and self determination you DO still manage to have and cling to. Yet you dust yourself off and keep going,  yea I fake being disabled.  Can't get to places easily, afford or access transport? Just explain that exactly, so people can comment and remind you that you don't actually have the friends and peo...

Support for Parents and Children with SEN materials: geldards  @KawaiiDollDecora ♡www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk ♡

  Dynamic Disabilities Awareness  Sarah Wingfield Author 🌹  @KawaiiDollDecora ♡ www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk ♡ 🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷 #positivity #selfhelp #dynamicdisabilities #peaceful #peacefullife #kawaiidolldecora #SarahWingfieldAuthor #kawaiidoll #canva #newtonaycliffe #disabilitytiktok #disabledartist #support #supportvideos #fyp #fypage #fypシ゚

 Why it's important for Neuro-Spicy individuals to avoid Negativity: How the behaviours of others might affect individuals on the autism spectrum The positive behaviour of others can have a profound impact on individuals with autism. When individuals with autism are surrounded by positive and supportive behaviour from those around them, it can contribute to their overall wellbeing, social development and self-esteem. Approaching an individual in a negative way is likely to cause a negative impact. All individuals will thrive in a positive environment and that is no different for individuals with autism. How negative behaviour from others can influence individuals with autism Negative behaviour, such as teasing, bullying or exclusion, can cause heightened anxiety in individuals with autism. They may become more anxious and vigilant in social settings, anticipating negative interactions. @KawaiiDollDecora ♡ www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk ♡ #fypシ゚ #fypage #fyp #supportvideos #support #...

 ..always USE your voice... No matter what...💋✨ Speaking up is crucial as it not only empowers individuals but also strengthens the collective voice, fostering a culture of inclusivity and progress.  Psychologically, when people use their voice, they assert their identity and advocate for people in similar situations, which is essential for mental well-being and self-esteem, as well as supporting others. Moreover, by contributing diverse perspectives, individuals help create a more balanced and resilient community, where different ideas are acknowledged and respected, leading to better decision-making and social harmony in the long run. Safe spaces become a result of this, the more people who are brave enough to speak out and speak up encourage others to do the same, irregardless of how others behave or perceive them.  This is important because it provides environments where individuals can express themselves without fear of judgment, discrimination, or harm.  We kn...

I have two options this morning: Just started women's time which flares up everything, have a sinus and ear infection and got through last night thanks to little bits of whiskey... ..and yet... Option one: I have to tackle decluttering today, otherwise I'll miss the free collection, so if I hurt myself atleast the council will know I've tried my best, gotta tackle things alone sometimes. Rules of the world... lone wolf lore...  ...or... Option two: ..I can stop trying to psyche myself up to do it when I know I can't and it will end up resulting in way more pain and an autistic meltdown and tears, and no one will likely understand..and I can just fob off the world and the system who *consistently* lets me down by failing to understand the complexity of dynamic disabilities to the point their *inflexibility* tends to be a detriment to the disabled and I can actually take my own advice and be KIND to myself today... -- ...for once I'm going to do the latter because at ...

 I've got an ear and sinus infection: temperature ✅, swelling ✅, dizziness ✅, vomited ✅, left side of face throbbing and feels like it's been hit with a truck and is now constantly prodded with needles ✅. Headache now too and bed for me ...can't study like this man. I'm only torturing myself more at this rate. Laundry is on and I've eaten. Got drink to keep hydrated. ✅ The world really isn't flexible at all, I hope I'm well enough to get on with the decluttering tomorrow for the collection deadline... *Cries* Ugh I didn't even get to make myself that coffee... Back to bed I go... I'll take my work with me just incase... Sarah x Image reads: "Living with chronic pain is hard, but dealing with those who don't care or understand is harder" -unknown/the healthy ...and now I'm living alone with my little fur baby Bud whose tried to cheer me up but bringing lots of toys to me and when that's failed has curled up next to me because I...

ebiketips.road.cc It also makes it more accessible for those with disabilities... ...I wear a helmet and I'm careful with mine but not everyone will be, responsible riders should be allowed to continue using them and public transport should allow folded scooters on without needing a carrying bag/holder bag for them. @KawaiiDollDecora ♡ www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk ♡

TW: sexual violence, abuse: (Just a positive meme/quote from Misa On Wheels emphasising that disabled people are people too and worthy of the same respect and care as everyone else.) I was given a leaflet to be referred to Rape and Sexual Abuse Counselling and it took them a few days to call back. I've phoned 8 times this morning from 9:15-09:40am so far and it seems the line is unmanned. The lady seemed a little upset when she called me close to 5pm yesterday that I couldn't handle the call at that time as I had my dog ready for a walk and he was crying, her expression of this was in comments that were full of peer pressure like stating how long the waiting list is but that doesn't change anything nor the fact I couldn't talk in the street at that time and should not be pressured into doing so. These issues are sensitive and how things are handled needs to be addressed. Too many negative experiences are still happening within the medical community and although I am ver...

Have you ever felt strung along? Made to dance around someone else's feelings? Never quite able to dance to your own drum when you're around them? I have... Dangled there, waiting for an indication for safe passage. Left hanging. The string, wearing thin. *Snap* Freedom came at a cost. A cost to my soul. The hate took hold. They were lost. They were cold. *Snap* Now I'm free. Sarah Wingfield Author 🌹  @KawaiiDollDecora ♡ www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk ♡ 21:25hrs  Tue Aug 20th 2024 Kawaii Doll Decora 🩷 ✨  Video of the art process.

  https://hollieguard.com/ Please save another females life. Tell them about the free app Hollie Guard. Sarah Wingfield Author 🌹 @KawaiiDollDecora ♡ www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk ♡ (You can also use this to alert or report anonymously about someone else being targeted. Never freeze up again, get on your phone and get them help!!)

 ❤️❤️❤️ I am using my voice because the world never listened. I am using my voice because I'm a recovering people pleaser. I will make mistakes. I will say the wrong things sometimes. But I will ALWAYS correct it. And I will NEVER pander to people keen on being nasty, negative and toxic themselves who try and deflect onto me. I'm not responsible for your shiii a$$ attitude, I'm only responsible for me! Make of it what you like, but my morals are NEVER on strike! 💪🏻❤️ Sarah Wingfield Author 🌹  @KawaiiDollDecora ♡ www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk ♡ 🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷 Image reads: "I don't like to build resentment because I know myself. I have to speak up otherwise you will eventually get a very cruel side of me. You might think my being outspoken is my aggressive side because it makes you uncomfortable but it's not." - ichriecheblut/x

The Skirt: I got that skirt for date nights but date nights never arrived, the coldness though was a constant brought in by the tide, of aggressive emotions, I was floating, trying to survive, he replaced me, a million times and destroyed me inside, from within I fought back, stopped loving the one who was keen to attack, put my foot down, stubborn, straightened my crown, but he still left me bruised and cracked. Sarah Wingfield Author 🌹  Mon Aug 29th 2024 @KawaiiDollDecora ♡ www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk ♡ #narcabuse #domesticviolence #theskirt #skirt #author #poetry #youmatter #narcabusesurvivor #narcissistsurvivor #itsnotyourfault 

  Positive Affirmations  Take what you need ✨ @KawaiiDollDecora ♡ www.magnoliaphotography.co.uk ♡ 🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷✨🩷

  Image reads " Let people go. If they don't want to ride the sexy, strange, magical, once-in-a-lifetime, radical, mystical and ever-evolving human fun train that is your frequency, that's their loss. Moving along..." Learning to let people go is hard, not just people you are close to, and need to let go for your own mental health and sanity, but letting others go after they've been cruel or invaded your lane. You feel like you fail the world if you just ignore them because no one else has had the bxlls to tell them the facts or hold a mirror up to their behaviour. You tell them how they're stepping wrong and why and they're welcome to disagree but it's hard to let them go without atleast bringing it to their attention; especially when their behaviour is so harmful to the point you can't bear another to have to endure it. You plant seeds with words and hope they sink in, but unfortunately people don't take too kindly to this, especially if it b...

I'm bleaching my hair and going pink for my fundraiser: https://fundraise.younglivesvscancer.org.uk/s/11222/11479 It's to raise funds for Young Lives Versus Cancer! This is not an easy task with a disability lol, I missed a patch so had to add more bleach and next it's pink dye time. I'm well out of my comfort zone but that's the whole point of fundraising isn't it? This month and next month I'll be having bright hair to raise money for little lives with cancer, this is a cause close to my heart from my own personal struggles seeing my baby boy, as a toddler, have to endure so much chemotherapy. It was a very difficult and sad and traumatic time for myself and my family and I just want to give a little back to those who are struggling today. I have lightened my hair so just need to add the pink soon. I'm wearing bright colours for August and September to raise atleast £150 for the poor little babies and children, and even teenagers and young adults up to...

  People and groups I no longer support since they caused me emotional pain or harm: Junction 7  All Disabilities Matter  Newton Press ADM: If you claim to support disabled people then disabled rights should come before free promotions and you should never belittle a disabled victim whose dealt with aggressive behaviour no matter how much you kiss the aggressors butt. Blocked Jackie McFadden because she allowed Tony to behave like this. I supported these, promoted these for years, befriended people when they failed to attend cafe meets, donated tombola prizes (at cost to myself) and raised funds for them. The thank you I got was Tony proving I don't matter, I'll forever remember this and thank you for showing me I was wasting my time helping a charity that doesn't actually care about disability just promotions, yet my promotions hit over 50k daily for them and was world-wide, they can stick with little old Newton Press now can't they. I haven't complained since they...

People who defend others being nasty or abusive confuse tf outta me...  I simply don't have time for people to lash out and blame me for arguments others start and which I only defend myself in.  They aren't friends.  Everyone has arguments, using that to justify a friend's abusive nature and deflect onto the person advocating for change is again, unhelpful. They're flying monkeys thinking that their friends are kind when I have evidence to the contrary and as a disability advocate it's my duty to raise awareness of the harmful things people say about the disabled. Using disabled relatives to hate on other disabled people is not 'nice' nor kind and is definable as ableist. Supporting friends who choose to be abusive because someone pointed out their passive aggressive responses help no one, on a post where they're concerned about kids playing barefoot near glass, is not actually helpful. Real friends call their friends out on bs and hate, they don't ...