PGP / SPD My story:

Abusive relationship advice (from lived experience): Trauma bonding can feel like an addiction — because in many ways, it functions like one. The hot-and-cold cycles of affection and withdrawal create intense emotional highs and lows that condition your nervous system. Over time, that pattern starts to feel familiar, and humans are naturally drawn to what feels familiar, even when it’s harmful. This is what makes the bond so strong. It isn’t love — it’s emotional conditioning. The manipulation of emotions keeps you chasing relief, reassurance, and connection, while slowly eroding your sense of safety and self. Understanding this isn’t about blame. It’s about clarity — and clarity is how the spell starts to break. But the moment you break it, the chains fall away — and you finally see the truth: the version of them you were clinging to was a fantasy, not reality. You are worthy of real love, safety, and consistency. You cannot find someone who will truly cherish or worship you while you...

Watching Kindness Disappear: People have been acting a bit wild lately. There’s a noticeable increase in hostile group behaviour, and while it often gets personalised, the truth is that most of the time it isn’t about the individual being targeted at all. We’re living in a time where people are tired, overwhelmed, and stretched thin. Life is hard. Systems are failing. Support is inconsistent. Many people are operating in survival mode. And when that happens, patience and empathy are often the first things to disappear. Sometimes it’s something as small as forgetting to say “please.” Sometimes it’s a message written bluntly because someone is exhausted, neurodivergent, anxious, or simply having a bad day. Instead of curiosity or compassion, what follows is a pile-on. A jump. A snap judgment. A sudden assumption of intent that was never there to begin with. What I see, again and again, is people waiting for a mistake. Waiting for a slip, a poorly worded sentence, a moment of vulnerabilit...

We’ve all been there — trying to create positive change, make things better, or simply stay in our own lane. And yet somehow, we find ourselves forced into defending ourselves or de-escalating situations we never caused. It’s important to remember this: we do not deserve to be targets of hate campaigns, nor anyone’s verbal punching bag. This image is dedicated to everyone who has found themselves caught in the middle of a battle they never asked for. I see you. I relate. You are not alone. Sarah Wingfield Independent Disability Advocate Kawaii Doll Decora 🌸 KawaiiDollDecora.uk #art #affirmations #shield #battles #disabilityinclusion #strongertogether #disability #disabilityawareness #disabilitysupport #disabilityrights Alt text: A kawaii-style illustration on a white background featuring a soft pink paint-splatter circle. In the centre is a pastel purple shield with two purple swords crossing behind it. Handwritten text on the shield reads, “I will be shielded from all unwanted battl...

No Onion Boyfriends   I created this for those out there with partners who make them cry more often than they make them feel safe, loved, or valued. Onion boyfriends — all layers, all tears, no nourishment. Know your worth. You are worthy of consistency, care, and emotional safety. You are worthy of love that doesn’t hurt, confuse, or drain you. And you are absolutely worthy of more than anyone who repeatedly makes you cry. This is your reminder: love shouldn’t feel like something you have to survive. 💜 Kawaii Doll Decora 🌸 KawaiiDollDecora.uk #onion #affirmations #youmatter #youdeservelove #tears #crying #heartbreak #hardship  Alt text: Colourful kawaii-style illustration of a purple onion with a single all-seeing eye in the centre, shedding stylised tears. The onion sits against a pastel rainbow heart background with halftone dots, sparkles, and star shapes. Neon green and pink text curves around the onion reading “NO MORE ONION BOYFRIENDS.” A small heart logo says “Kawaii...

City Rush 4 Wins October Award for “Most Technically Excellent” at Athens International Monthly Art Film Festival 2025 I’m proud to share that City Rush 4 has received the October Award for “Most Technically Excellent” at the Athens International Monthly Art Film Festival 2025. This award recognises the technical craft behind the film — the precision, planning, and execution that go into making everything work cohesively on screen. It’s a category that highlights the often unseen work: cinematography, editing, sound, pacing, and the many technical decisions that shape the final result. This recognition belongs to the entire team. Film is never the work of one person, and City Rush 4 was a genuine collaborative effort. Every member of the cast and crew contributed skill, time, and professionalism, and this award reflects that collective dedication. Creating film is rarely easy. It requires adaptability, long hours, problem-solving, and commitment, often under pressure. To have that work...

Meta Support Fails to Hold Their Own Misuse of Policies and Procedures to Account I have now reached the point where silence speaks louder than policy. After my account was demonetised by Meta over an image they classified as “sexual in nature,” (a chatGPT image falsely categorised as such) I followed the correct process. I asked for transparency. I asked for the legal basis. I asked for accountability. What I received instead was dismissal. Despite repeated, clearly written requests grounded in UK law, Meta support has refused to provide the most basic information required to justify an income-affecting enforcement decision. This is not a misunderstanding. This is not a disagreement over taste or content. This is a failure of governance. What I asked for (reasonably and lawfully) I formally requested: The specific policy provision relied upon to classify the content as sexual Confirmation of whether the demonetisation decision involved automated decision-making, human review, or a com...

  Mini facts about Autism 🩵 • Autism is neurological, not behavioural. • Autism is a spectrum, not a straight line. • No two autistic people are the same. • Autism is lifelong — not something you grow out of. • Many autistic people have strong sensory differences. • Stimming helps with regulation, not misbehaviour. • Autism is not caused by bad parenting. • Some autistic people are non-speaking and still fully intelligent. • Communication can look different — and still be valid. • Routine often brings comfort and safety. • Meltdowns are overload, not tantrums. • Autism exists in every culture and country. • Girls and minorities are often underdiagnosed. • Autism can include intense focus and deep interests. • Eye contact is not a measure of respect. • Autism can co-occur with ADHD, anxiety, or epilepsy. • Support needs can change day to day. • Autistic joy matters just as much as autistic struggle. • Acceptance improves quality of life more than “fixing”. • Autistic people deserve...

You Can’t Dunning-Kruger Away Disability: Today I experienced something that highlights a much wider problem within discussions about disability and neurodivergence. A man entered an ADHD group, openly flaunting his Psychology PhD, and used that perceived authority to make sweeping, harmful claims about people with ADHD — framing the condition as an excuse to avoid accountability. When those claims were challenged with evidence, lived experience, and respectful factual correction, he didn’t engage. Instead, he mocked, dismissed, and ultimately blocked me. I did not hide behind a nickname. I spoke openly, calmly, and transparently as a woman and as a disabled advocate. That visibility made me a target — not because I was wrong, but because I refused to be silent or defer to ego over evidence. This isn’t about “winning” an argument. It’s about what happens when people prioritise authority, credential flexing, and belittlement over meaningful discussion — and how that behaviour actively h...

The biggest issue for chronic pain warriors is not 'addiction' it's suicide #suicideawareness Credit: KawaiiDollDecora.UK Sarah Wingfield  Independent Disability Advocate    #disabilityinclusion #strongertogether #disability #disabilityawareness #disabilitysupport #disabilityrights Alt text: Pastel kawaii-style illustration showing a sad-looking young woman with long pink hair and glasses, hugging a plush bunny for comfort. She is surrounded by soft clouds, hearts, sparkles, and a rainbow arching across the top. Cute but somber details include small skull characters, a crying cloud holding a noose-shaped rope, and a tipped-over pill bottle with tablets spilling out, symbolising the seriousness of chronic pain and mental health struggles. Text on the image reads: “The biggest issue for chronic pain warriors is not ‘addiction’ it’s suicide” with the hashtag #suicideawareness. The artwork is signed and credited “KawaiiDollDecora.UK” in a pastel, dreamy background.

When Medical Authority Becomes Abuse: While decluttering today, I came across my formal complaint from 2009 — the one where I challenged a gynaecologist (I’ll call him Mr O) who was repeatedly abusive and inappropriate towards me during pregnancy. Reading his responses now, with distance and clarity, the hypocrisy is glaring. His explanations don’t hold up against medical facts. He openly shows disdain toward me for using medical knowledge to challenge his behaviour — particularly around the treatment of Symphysis Pubis Dysfunction, which he clearly misrepresented. He attempts to justify referring me for psychiatric evaluations and social services investigations, presenting this as “normal duty of care for every mother.” He supports this narrative by claiming I was abusive and that everyone around me would say the same. Of course they would — because he had already primed staff by labelling me “psychosomatic.” He dismissed my documented physical needs, including my need for a stairlift...

Clarification Vs. Assumptions: Why do some men seek excuses to be abusive over seeking clarification? Projecting assumptions about you onto you to justify their own ego and negativity. Bro, I ain't your enemy, your own mind however and eagerness to be cruel to women you don't know.. that's your enemy right there. 🎯 This pattern isn’t about misunderstanding — it’s about choice. A few things are usually going on when someone seeks excuses to be abusive instead of asking for clarification: 1. Ego protection over truth Clarification requires humility. Abuse lets them feel right without doing the work. If they pause to ask, they risk discovering they’re wrong — and some egos would rather burn bridges than face that. 2. Projection as a defence mechanism They offload their own anger, shame, entitlement, or insecurity onto you. It’s easier to say “you’re the problem” than to sit with “why am I so reactive?” 3. Control feels safer than curiosity Curiosity opens dialogue. Abuse shut...

I don’t need closure from people who refuse accountability. I used to feel like I did and it opened up opportunities for people who pretend to be kind to be even more abusive.  I no longer allow them to harm me under the guise of 'kindness'. They know exactly who and how they are and kind isn't one of the descriptors. 🔥🔥🔥 Kawaii Doll Decora 🌸 KawaiiDollDecora.uk Alt text: Pastel kawaii-style quote image with a soft pink, lavender, and peach gradient background filled with hearts, sparkles, clouds, and a rainbow. Cute characters include a bunny, heart-shaped lock and key, a teddy bear with a plaster, and an angel girl symbolising healing and protection. Centred text states that closure is not needed from people who refuse accountability and rejects abuse disguised as kindness, ending with flame emojis to emphasise strength and boundaries. The credit “KawaiiDollDecora.uk” appears at the bottom.

Completing the Work That Found Me: I’m proud to share that I’ve just finished and submitted my final unit for my Level 2 qualification in Understanding Domestic Abuse. This course was not easy. It was emotionally demanding, particularly because of my own lived experiences. But it was also necessary. Learning in this area matters deeply to me — not just academically, but ethically — because education is one of the most powerful tools we have to prevent harm, support survivors, and challenge systems that fail people. As the Director of a newly formed CIC, I intend to use this knowledge practically and responsibly. Through workshops, community sessions, and collaborative projects, I will be incorporating domestic abuse awareness and education alongside the work I already do in mental health and disability advocacy. While Let’s Talk North East CIC has a strong focus on mental health support, I am proud to now also offer: • disability awareness and understanding • domestic abuse awareness a...

I do not condone hate campaigns at any level. I understand that some supporters are angry about the mistreatment I have received from #Retrophiliac, but if we respond by treating others the way I was treated, then we are no better than the behaviour we are calling out.🙌🏻 Under no circumstances do we retaliate with harm. If others choose to act in harmful ways, that is their responsibility — not ours. We do not mirror harassment, abuse, or intimidation. What happened to me was genuinely distressing, and I do not minimise that. But I will not endorse harassment of any kind, even when emotions are running high. Integrity matters to me more than outrage. I believe in accountability. I believe in boundaries. And I believe in karma. Sarah Wingfield  Independent Disability Advocate  #disabilityinclusion #strongertogether #disability #disabilityawareness #disabilitysupport #disabilityrights Alt text: Soft, gentle illustration symbolising emotional exhaustion and healing. A calm, pas...

Twisting the Narrative: People have continued to alert me that Retrophiliac is still twisting the narrative and producing judgemental content that has directly contributed to real-world harm against me. At no point did I say that any disabled person is intrinsically better than another. What I stated — clearly — is that the message matters more than the money, while also affirming that disabled creators absolutely deserve to be paid for their work. What disabled creators do not deserve is for larger pages to prioritise monetisation so aggressively that they demand content be removed unless it benefits them financially, or to weaponise their platforms by spreading false narratives that result in smaller creators being harassed, abused, or financially penalised — as I was. This situation was never about denying payment to disabled people. It is about values, ethics, and responsibility. When a platform is used to harm rather than help — especially by targeting smaller advocates — the issu...

Low Spoons, Real Impact Hey everyone, Today is one of those days where unnecessary negativity has drained my spoons faster than I can replenish them. I’m struggling — but I’ll be okay. I’m trying to anchor myself to my to-do list, because there are things that need doing and people I don’t want to let down. Even when I’m running on empty, that still matters to me. What people often fail to understand is that when platforms and positions are abused — when negativity is encouraged, amplified, or weaponised — it doesn’t stay online. It has real-world consequences. And if you’re disabled, already living with chronic pain, fatigue, and limited capacity, those consequences hit harder. I’m not expecting everyone to understand. I’m not even expecting them to care. Some people genuinely can’t — or won’t — see beyond themselves. But right now, I do need extra support. Not because I’m weak, but because I’m tired. Tired of constant battles. Tired of hate. Tired of being treated like a “nobody” peo...

When larger pages target smaller, genuine advocates and spread false narratives, they don’t just create online drama — they trigger hate campaigns with real-world consequences. If she truly cares about disabled women being paid for their work, then why have her #flyingmonkeys been encouraged to harass me, and why has my #monetisation now been directly affected? Retrophiliac cannot credibly argue for disabled women’s financial empowerment while simultaneously contributing to actions that undermine a disabled woman’s ability to earn. Yesterday, she publicly attacked and misrepresented me. Today, I am financially penalised as a result. That is not advocacy. That is harm. Sarah Wingfield Independent Disability Advocate P.S. It’s a good job I care about people more than profit, isn’t it? #disabilityinclusion #strongertogether #disability #disabilityawareness #disabilitysupport #disabilityrights Alt text: Screenshot of a monetisation status page showing the name “Sarah Wingfield” with “Main ...

Yes I am aware Retrophiliac has changed the narrative and is also lying about me on their page. Disabled people deserve to be paid - absolutely - so why is Retrophiliac changing the narrative to bully and harass me and make money from people's hate? I’m FULLY aware that the narrative around this situation has been changed and that inaccurate claims are now being shared about me. I do not condone hate or harassment — especially not from disabled people towards other disabled people. While the core point being raised is valid, the way this situation has been handled is not. When disabled advocates attack other disabled advocates for attempting to promote and uplift them—particularly when platform limitations (such as Facebook not allowing reshares) are the cause—this should never be turned into false or hateful narratives. Creating or amplifying misinformation to drive engagement, attention, or financial gain at the expense of another disabled person is not advocacy. Encouraging peo...

Mental Health, Softness, and Letting Myself Be Human Some days I am strong in ways people can see. Other days my strength is invisible — quiet, internal, and misunderstood. Living with disability, neurodivergence, chronic pain, and a nervous system that has been through far more than it ever should have been, means my mental health doesn’t exist in neat boxes. It ebbs and flows. It reacts to the world. It responds to kindness — and it also reacts to harm. And that’s not a flaw. That’s being human. For a long time, I thought I had to prove my wellness. Prove I was coping. Prove I was resilient enough, calm enough, polite enough, palatable enough. I thought that if I just explained myself better, softened my words more, tolerated more, then things would be easier. They weren’t. What did help was learning something far gentler: I am allowed to take up space exactly as I am. My best does not look the same every day. Some days my best is advocacy, creativity, writing, supporting others, and...

So now the 'FOR profit only advocate' with a 22k following "Retrophiliac" is sending people to be abusive and to harass me.  I did what she wanted, I deleted her tagged post with her credited images, and as she's not in alignment with my Advocacy I stepped away and blocked their page. This is what happens when you cause unnecessary conflict > publicly < instead of communicating civilly. I am currently being subjected to harassment and false claims after choosing to step away from a space that I no longer felt was safe, honest, or constructive. I apologised, complied with requests made of me, and went on to create my own original content, rooted in my lived experience, advocacy, and education.  I have not stolen anyone’s work, and claims suggesting otherwise are untrue. I am allowed to disengage from harmful environments and from spaces that prioritise public conflict over resolution.  I am also allowed to block pages and individuals who encourage harassment ...

“I don’t know how to convince you to care about other people.” I don’t know how to convince you to care about other people. And honestly? I shouldn’t have to. Empathy isn’t radical. Inclusion isn’t political. Caring about disabled people, marginalised communities, and those different from you is the bare minimum of being human. If someone’s existence feels like an inconvenience to you, that’s not their problem — it’s a values problem. We all deserve dignity. We all deserve access. We all deserve to belong. No convincing required. 💗 Sarah Wingfield ❤️  Independent Disability Advocate  #DisabilityAwareness #InclusionMatters #EmpathyIsNotOptional #HumanRights #KawaiiDollDecora Alt text: Illustrated group of diverse children standing together, smiling and holding a sign that reads “I don’t know how to convince you to care about other people.” The children vary in skin tone, hair, clothing, and ability, including two wheelchair users and a child wearing a hijab. Soft pastel backgr...

“Accessibility helps everyone!” Accessibility helps everyone — not just disabled people. Ramps help parents with prams. Captions help non-native speakers as well as the hard of hearing. Clear communication helps neurodivergent minds. Flexible systems help all of us when life changes. Accessibility isn’t special treatment. It’s thoughtful design. It’s community care and inclusion. It’s the world acknowledging that humans are diverse — and that’s a good thing. When we build with inclusion in mind, nobody is left behind. ♿🌸 Sarah Wingfield ❤️  Kawaii Doll Decora 🌸 Independent Disability Advocate  #AccessibilityForAll #DisabilityAdvocacy #InclusiveDesign #AccessIsCare #KawaiiDollDecora Alt text: Cute illustrated scene in a park with four diverse characters standing together and holding a sign that reads “Accessibility helps everyone!” From left to right: a child with pink hair in space buns wearing pastel clothing; a smiling person with dark skin and short locs waving; a person ...

Ableism - A Break Down by Kawaii Doll Decora: Ableism isn’t always loud. Sometimes it looks like misunderstanding, impatience, or punishment for thinking differently. This series breaks down how learning and cognitive differences are often mislabelled as personal failings — instead of recognised as valid differences in how brains work. Needing more time, clearer wording, repetition, or literal language isn’t a flaw. It’s not a failure. And you are not alone. This space exists to educate gently, reduce shame, and remind people that safety, boundaries, and self-trust matter. 💗 By Kawaii Doll Decora  🌸 Disability-affirming education & advocacy 🔗 KawaiiDollDecora.uk #ableism #disabilityinclusion #strongertogether #disability #disabilityawareness #disabilitysupport #disabilityrights Alt text: A series of soft pastel pink, kawaii-style infographics by Kawaii Doll Decora explaining ableism and neurodivergent processing. A gentle illustrated character appears throughout, seated at a...

If you’re an advocate who doesn’t want content reshared and tagged, please let me know — or block me. We won’t be able to collaborate due to platform sharing limits, and I respect clarity over conflict. I can also stop my own posts from being shared if that’s your preference, but that part is often overlooked. Disability isn’t a business. It’s our life. #Apologies #MoneyOverMessage #Advocacy #Awareness #Ableism I want to start by apologising for sharing educational disability awareness content from another page, clearly tagging the creator and ensuring people knew the work was theirs. My intention was visibility, education, and directing people to their page — not control, profit, or misrepresentation. That said, a note to fellow advocates: please be mindful when raising awareness advocate to advocate. Sometimes, the message matters less to people than the money attached to it. Due to Facebook’s sharing limits, I’m not always able to share posts in the usual way. When that happens, sha...

AI, Access, and the Weight of Other People’s Judgement: It’s easy to criticise AI music when you’ve never had your access to creativity limited by disability. That sentence alone carries more truth than most of the debates I see online. For many disabled artists, AI isn’t a shortcut. It isn’t laziness. It isn’t a lack of skill or passion. It’s an access tool. Full stop. When people argue about “artistic purity” or “real musicianship,” they often forget — or choose to ignore — the very real, very physical barriers that disabled artists face before we even get near the creative part. Accessing looper packs. Affording beats. Navigating software designed without disabled bodies or neurodivergent minds in mind. Enduring pain, fatigue, brain fog, seizing up, limited mobility, or being bedbound — and still wanting to create something meaningful. These aren’t abstract concepts to me. They’re my life. I didn’t start making music for clout or controversy. I started because I was bedbound for ov...

Discover all that Kawaii Doll Decora has to offer on our website! Stay informed with the latest updates, explore our wide range of offerings, and connect with everything exciting happening here. Visit us at https://kawaiidolldecora.uk today to see what’s waiting for you! Alt text: Portrait-style header image showing Sarah Wingfield centred against a soft, pastel background filled with blurred flowers and gentle light. She has long pastel pink hair and wears a red beret, red lipstick, subtle heart-shaped makeup on her cheek, and a silver necklace. Her hand is raised near her face, showing manicured nails. Overlaid text at the bottom centre reads “Sarah Wingfield,” with smaller text beneath stating “ACTRESS | AUTHOR | ADVOCATE +.” The overall aesthetic is feminine, calm, and professional with a nature-inspired, dreamy feel.